Quotes from
Planes, Trains & Automobiles (1987)
Del: Was that seat hot or what? I feel like a Whopper. Turn me over, I'm done and ready. I'm afraid to look at my ass. There'll be grill marks.
Neal: What do you suppose the temperature is?
Del: One.
Neal: You're like one of those Chatty Cathy dolls except I'm not pulling the string, you are. Blah! Blah! Blah!
Del: You play with your balls alot.
Neal: Oh really?
Del: Yeah, you do more ballhandling in one minute than Larry Bird does in an hour.
Neal: You know what I'd really like?
Del: A couple of more hands and an extra set of balls?
Car Rental Agent: I really don't care for the way you're speaking to me.
Neal Page: And I really don't care for the way your company left me in the middle of fucking nowhere with fucking keys to a fucking car that isn't fucking there. And I really didn't care to fucking walk down a fucking highway and across a fucking runway to get back here to have you smile at my fucking face. I want a fucking car RIGHT FUCKING NOW!
Car Rental Agent: May I see your rental agreement.
Neal Page: I threw it away.
Car Rental Agent: Oh boy.
Neal Page: Oh boy what?
Car Rental Agent: You're fucked!
Del Griffith: We'd have more luck playing pick-up sticks with our butt-cheeks than we will getting a flight out of here before daybreak.
Neal Page: Eh, look, I don't want to be rude, but I'm not much of a conversationalist, and I really want to finish this article, a friend of mine wrote it, so...
Del Griffith: Don't let me stand in your way, please don't let me stand in your way. The last thing I want to be remembered as is an annoying blabbermouth... You know, nothing grinds my gears worse than some chowderhead that doesn't know when to keep his big trap shut... If you catch me running off with my mouth, just give me a poke on the chubbs...
[Waking up after sharing the same bed on the motel]
Neal Page: Del... Why did you kiss my ear?
Del Griffith: Why are you holding my hand?
Neal Page: Where are your other hand?
Del Griffith: Between two pillows...
Neal Page: Those AREN'T PILLOWS!!!
[Driving on the wrong side of the highway]
Neal Page: He says we're going the wrong way...
Del Griffith: Oh, he's drunk. How would he know where we're going?
Police Officer: What the hell are you driving here?
Del Griffith: We had a small fire last night, but we caught it in a nick of time.
Police Officer: Do you have any idea how fast you were going?
Del Griffith: Funny enough, I was just talking to my friend about that. Our speedometer has melted and as a result it's very hard to see with any degree of accuracy exactly how fast we were going.
Neal Page: You know... you know when you're telling these little stories? Here's a good idea: have a point. It makes it so much more interesting for the listener!
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