Quotes from
Beavis and Butt-head Do America (1996)
[Plane is crashing because of Butthead.]
Pilot: Get the hell out of the cockpit!
Butt-head: Uhh. Ha huh huh, You said..
Pilot: NOW!
Agent Bork: Chief! Ya know that guy whose camper they were whackin' off in?
Agent Fleming: Bork, you're a federal agent! You represent the United States Government! Never end a sentence with a preposition.
Agent Bork: Oh, uh... Ya know that guy in whose camper they... I... I mean, that guy off in whose camper they were whacking?
President Clinton: Beavis and Butt-head, on behalf of your fellow Americans I extend my deepest thanks. You exemplify a fine new crop of young Americans who will grow into the leaders of this great country.
Butt-head: Huh huh huh, he said extend!
Beavis: Oh, yeah!
[After apprehending Butt-head.]
Agent Fleming: Agent Hurley, I want you to give this scumbag a cavity search! I'm talking Roto-Rooter! Don't stop until you reach the back of his teeth!
Hoover Dam Guide: Now, are there any dam questions?
Beavis: Yeah. Is this a God damn?
[Dallas Grimmes mistakes Beavis and Butt-head for hit men who are hunting her.]
Dallas Grimmes: 10 grand! I'll double it if you go back and do him.
Butt-head: You want us to do a guy? No way!
Beavis: I don't know, Butt-head. It is a lot of money! Maybe we can close our eyes and pretend he's a pretty good chick.
[Walking down hallway of the White House, stops at picture of Nixon and stares at it.]
Beavis: Are you threatening ME?!!
Tom Anderson: Boy, I never seen so much whackin'.
Beavis: I am the great Cornholio. I need T.P. for my bunghole.
Beavis: I poop too much.
Little Old Lady: Ohh. Maybe your lactose intolerant.
Beavis: No. No. I poop too much. Then I get tired.
Beavis: Why does everybody want to see my schlong?
[After the T.V. has been stolen]
Butt-head: This sucks more than anything that's ever sucked before.
Old Woman on Bus: Are you two heading for Las Vegas?
Beavis: Yeah. We're gonna score.
Old Woman on Bus: I'm hope to score big there myself. I'll mostly gonna be doing the slots.
Beavis: Yeah, yeah. I'm hoping to do some sluts too. Do they have a lot sluts in Las Vegas?
Old Woman on Bus: Agh. There's so many Slots you won't know where to begin.
Beavis:Whoa. Hey Butthead, this chick is pretty cool. She said there's gonna be tons of sluts in Las Vegas.
Butthead:Cool.
[After a cavity search by a female FBI agent]
Butt-head: Did I just score?
Agent Flemming: Well I'll be a monkey's bare assed uncle.
Butt-head: This is gonna be cool. We're getting paid to score.
Beavis: Yeah yeah, hnh hnh, then we're gonna get a big-screen TV, with *two* remotes! Hnh hnh.
Butt-head: Beavis, this is the greatest day of our lives.
[Eight M-16 assault rifles pointed at him]
Butt-head: This is the coolest thing I have ever seen.
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