Quotes from
Robin Hood: Men in Tights (1993)

[Preparing to ravish Maid Marian.]
Sherrif of Rottingham: A chastity belt! That's really going to chafe my willy!


Achoo: Hey, Blinkin!
Blinkin: Did you say "Abe Lincoln"?
Achoo: No. I said, "Hey, Blinkin!"

[Blinkin, the blind man, is up in a perch looking out for strangers.]
Robin Hood: Blinkin! What are you doing?
Blinkin: Guessing. I guess no one's coming.

Little John: That there is Will Scarlet.
Scarlet: My whole name is Will Scarlet O'Hara. We're from Georgia.

Blinkin: Oh Master Robin! [hugging a statue] You lost your arms in battle! But you grew some nice boobs.
Robin of Locksley: Blinkin, I'm over here.

Robin of Locksley: Prepare for the fight scene!

Prince: Such an unusual name, "Latrine." How did your family come by it?
Latrine: We changed it in the 9th century.
Prince: You mean you changed it TO "Latrine"?
Latrine: Yeah. Used to be "Shithouse."
Prince: It's a good change. That's a good change!

Man in church: Hey Abbot!
Abbot: I hate that guy!

Prince John: And why would the people listen to you?
Robin of Locksley: Because, unlike some other Robin Hoods, I can speak with an English accent.

Blinkin: This never would have happened if your father had been here.
Robin Hood: He's dead?
Blinkin: Yes.
Robin Hood: And my mother?
Blinkin: She died of pneumonia while -- while you were away.
Robin Hood: My dog Pongo?
Blinkin: Run over by a carriage.
Robin Hood: My goldfish Goldie?
Blinkin: Eaten by the cat.
Robin Hood: My cat?
Blinkin: Choked on the goldfish. It's great to be home, isn't it, Master Robin?

Prince John: I tell you that tonight, we shall have a wedding. Or a hanging. Either way, we ought to have a lot of fun, huh?

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