Quotes from
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Lois Lane: Any more like you at home? Lex Luthor: This is Lex Luthor. Only one thing alive with less than four legs can hear this frequency, Superman, and that's you. Lex Luthor: It's kryptonite, Superman. A little souvenir from the old home town. I spared no expense in making you feel right at home. [Miss Teschmacher suggests Superman may be a hoax; Lex Luthor disagrees.] Miss Tessmacher: And why not? Lex Luthor: Because if any human being were going to perpetrate such a fantastic hoax, it would've been me! [After he's described his plan to trap Superman.] Lex Luthor: Doesn't it give you a... shudder... of electricity through you to be in the same room with me? [Pointing to a map of California and the San Andreas fault.] Lex Luthor: Everything west of this line is the richest, most expensive real estate in the world: San Diego, Los Angeles, San Francisco. Everything on THIS side of the line is just hundreds and hundreds of miles of worthless desert land, which just so happens to be owned by... [whaps Otis with his pointer] Otis: Uhhh... Lex Luthor Incorporated. Lex Luthor: Now, call me foolish, call me irresponsible, but it occurs to me that a 500 megaton bomb planted at just the proper point would, uh... Superman: Would destroy most of California. Millions of innocent people would be killed. And the west coast as we know it would--- Lex Luthor: Fall into the sea. [With a little wave] Bye bye California. Hello new west coast. My west coast. [overlays map with new map] Costa Del Lex. Luthorville. Marina del Lex. Otisburg-- "Otisburg"? Otis: Miss Tessmacher said. She has her own little place. Lex Luthor: "Otisburg"? Otis: It's a little bitty place! Lex Luthor: [angrily] "Otisburg"? Otis: Alright, I'll wipe it off, that's all. [erases "Otisburg"] Lex Luthor: We all have our little faults. Mine's in California. Young Clark Kent: All those things I can do. All those powers. And I couldn't even save him. Clark Kent: Mr. White, I was wondering if you could arrange for half my salary to be sent to this address on a weekly basis. Lois Lane: Your bookie, right? Clark Kent: My what? Lois Lane: Don't tell me: he sends a check every week to his sweet, grey-haired old mother. Clark Kent: Actually, she's silver-haired. Clark Kent: Really, Lois, supposing that man had shot you? Is it worth risking your life over ten dollars, two credit cards, a hairbrush, and a lipstick? Lois Lane: How did you know that? Clark Kent: Know what? Lois Lane: You just described the exact contents of my purse. Clark Kent: Hmm. Lucky guess. Superman: Easy, miss. I've got you. Lois Lane: You've got me? Who's got you? [Superman gets a cat out of a tree.] Superman: Here you go, miss. Little girl: Gee, thanks, mister. Superman: Well, so long, Frisky. Good night, miss. Little girl: Good night. [runs inside] Mommy! Mommy! Frisky was caught in a tree! This man swooped down out of the sky and gave him to me! Mommy: Haven't I told you to stop telling lies? Perry White: Now look. The Post: "It Flies." The News: "Look, Ma, No Wires." The Times: "Blue Bomb Buzzes Metropolis." The Planet. I want the name of this flying whatchamacallit to go with the Daily Planet like bacon and eggs, franks and beans, death and taxes, politics and corruption. [Superman and Lois are standing on opposite sides of a large planter.] Lois Lane: What color underwear am I wearing? Superman: [looking] Hmmm... Lois Lane: Oh, gee, I embarrassed you, didn't I? Superman: Oh, no, no, not at all, it's just that this planter must be made of lead. Lois Lane: Yeah, it is. So? Superman: Well, I sort of have a problem seeing through lead. Lois Lane: Oh, that's interesting. [writes] Problem seeing through lead. Do you have a first name? Superman: You mean, like, Ralph or something? Lois Lane: [walks away from the planter] No, I mean like - Superman: Pink. Lois Lane: Hm? Superman: Pink. [Lois walks back to the planter.] Sorry, Miss Lane, I didn't mean to embarrass *you*. Lex Luthor: [to Otis] Do you know why the number two hundred is so vitally descriptive of both you and me? It's your weight and my I.Q. [Miss Teschmacher is posing as the victim of a car wreck.] Sergeant: She's having trouble breathing sir. What do you suggest? Major: Um, I suggest a vigorous chest massage, and if that doesn't work, uh, mouth-to-mouth. Sergeant: [enthusiastically] Yes, sir! [Bends to the task. The Major pulls him to his feet.] Major: Sergeant, I wouldn't have one of my men do something I wouldn't be prepared to do myself. Sergeant: [disappointed] Yeah, but sir! [Superman breaks down Lex Luthor's door.] Lex Luthor: It's open, come in. My attorney will be in touch with you about the damage to the door. Otis, take the gentleman's cape, would you? Superman: Is that how a warped brain like yours gets its kicks? By planning the deaths of innocent people? Lex Luthor: No, by causing the deaths of innocent people. Warden: This country is safe again, Superman, thanks to you! Superman: No sir. Don't thank me, Warden. We're all part of the same team. Good night. [Watching Otis approaching the hideout] Lex Luthor: It's amazing that brain can generate enough power to keep those legs moving. Lex Luthor: Some people can read War and Peace and come away thinking it's a simple adventure story. Others can read the ingredients on a chewing gum wrapper and unlock the secrets of the universe. Lex Luthor: Miss Teschmacher, when I was six years old my father said to me-- Eve Teschmacher: "Get out." Lex Luthor: Ha ha. Before that. He said, "Son, stocks may rise and fall, utilities and transportation systems may collapse. People are no damn good, but they will always need land and they will pay through the nose to get it! Remember," my father said... Otis: "...land." Lex Luthor: Right. Superman: I'm here to fight for truth, justice, and the American way. Lois Lane: You're gonna wind up fighting every elected official in this country!  Main Page...or Look at some Movie Pics |